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Saturday, January 12, 2013

Government Sees No Need to Build Death Star (Darn)

Can you just imagine what it would be like to have the awesome, destructive power of the Death Star at your control? Talk about intoxicating; to be able to turn another planet into ruble just because you can....

Well, there are some folks that thought it would be a good idea for the government to have one so they started a petition online to request the government do just that. Sure enough, there were way more than the 25,000 signatures that the government requires for a response. So the government did!

And the answer is no.

In spite of the obvious job benefits (on one hand there will probably not be a single American unemployed, but then again whoever would have been in charge of it probably would have outsourced most of the labor to Mexico anyway...) it was simply deemed a project that was doomed from the start (so why start?).

"The Administration shares your desire for job creation and a strong national defense,” writes Paul Shawcross, chief of the science and space branch of the White House’s budget office. But “the Administration does not support blowing up planets.”
No one said we actually had to blow anything up; this could serve as a deterrent from intergalactic warfare. Has the government seen Battleship? Come on man!
“Why would we spend countless taxpayer dollars on a Death Star with a fundamental flaw that can be exploited by a one-man starship?”
That is a pretty good point (assuming starships exist...).

In reference to the $852 quadrillion price tag:
“...we’re working hard to reduce the deficit, not expand it.”
Well, it was a nice idea while it lasted. I sure hope the aliens don't take it as a sign of weakness and decide to pick now to attack. We may not have a Death Star, but we still have a Luke Skywalker or two!

[Kudos to the government for taking the time to do something funny. The petition site is a great idea that has spawned a lot of wackiness. There is no reason why the government should not respond to that wackiness with some of its own.]



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